Love Virtues or Virtual Love?


Are you in love?

If yes, let me congratulate you, my friend. Love is a truly awesome feeling. It makes our existence meaningful; it lends us excitement, passion and the wings of hope.

And if you are not, don’t panic. The modern world has tons of opportunities  for us to find our soul mates. One of them is Internet. You can find your happiness on various dating websites, social networks and old-fashioned chats.

As a teenager I was a big fan of making new acquaintances online. Occasionally, I would convince myself that I was in love with a human silhouette, who did not have a name, just a nick instead. It did not bother me that my ‘virtual’ relationships were surreal. The truth is that I had various nicknames myself, switching from one identity to another, exploring the world of possibilities out there, while being totally insecure about my actual reality.

Back in those days, I didn’t know much about the potential dangers of such ‘friendship’. My parents, who grew up with no Internet access whatsoever (hard to believe, I know) had no idea about what was going on. I guess they were not alone in their denial: more and more teenagers were raped, mugged and killed by their ‘virtual’ soul mates who ended up being ordinary criminals in everyday life.

As I got older I realised that Internet love could never substitute what love really is: the looks, the touch, the desire to overcome difficulties together.

I stopped chatting, however, I would still see various dating websites ads. Recently I saw a new ad of a dating portal for English speaking men,  interested in Russian brides. The banner looks like this:

It is quite amusing to see the way single women are presented on dating websites, as if girls are displayed on supermarket shelves. Their pictures are carefully chosen to show their looks, as if it is a grocery label.

Being an immigrant from Russia myself, I understand why these desperate women are ready to get married to complete strangers and leave their country to get stability of the Western World. The truth is, that grass always looks greener on the other side,  and there is no guarantee that their married life is going to turn into a Hollywood movie. On the contrary, what usually happens is a culture shock, mentality clashes and depression.

So too, I was shocked by the amount of Western men, who want to get married to Russians, ignoring the fact that there are major communication problems, big age difference and little personal contact. What kind of future is ahead of these couples? As of now, the divorce rate in Australia is 46 % of all marriages. In the States 50 % of all couples go apart, as well. I just don’t understand, why so many singles are trying to find love online, meeting foreigners, who are very different from them, to begin with?

And I will never believe that virtual love can possibly compare with true feelings of  friendship, hatred and, of course, love. Been there – done that. Does anyone think otherwise?

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Categories: digital media, feelings, love | Tags: , , | Leave a comment

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